Potpourri of Maine Jokes
Submitted by Bill Cushing
The
owner of a golf course in Maine was confused about paying an
invoice, so he decided to ask his secretary for some
mathematical help. He called her into his office and said, "You
graduated from the University of Maine, and I need some help. If
I were to give you $20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take
off?" The secretary thought a moment, then replied, "Everything
but my earrings."
You gotta love those women from Maine.
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A group of Maine friends went deer hunting and paired off in
twos for the day. That night, one of the hunters returned alone,
staggering under the weight of an eight-point buck. "Where's
Harry?" the others asked.
"Harry had a stroke of some kind. He's a couple of miles back up
the trail," the successful hunter replied.
"You
left Harry laying out there and carried the deer back?" they
inquired.
"A
tough call," nodded the hunter. "But I figured no one is going
to steal Harry!
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Regarding the year 2000, a senior at University of Maine was
overheard saying "when the end of the world comes, I hope to be
in "Maine" When asked why, he stated that everything happens
here 20 years later than the rest of the civilized world.
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The young Mainer came running into the store and said to his
buddy, "Elmer, somebody just stole your pickup truck from the
parking lot!"
Elmer
replied, "Did you see who it was?
The
young fella answered, "I couldn't tell, but I got the license
number."
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NEWS FLASH! - Bethel, Maine----- Maine's worst air disaster
occurred when a small two-seater Cessna 150 plane, piloted by
two local Maine college students, crashed into a cemetery
earlier today in Bethel. Bethel search and rescue workers have
recovered 300 bodies so far and expect the number to climb as
digging continues into the evening.
The pilot and copilot survived and are helping in the recovery
efforts.
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And my personal favorite:
A Maine State trooper pulled over a pickup on Route 11. The
trooper asked, "Got any ID?" The driver replied, bout what?
