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Blogged Titles
Moving
Bowels
It's no secret that I hate doctors and more
specifically general, I hate the entire medical profession. It's a racket
On Bullshit
Bullshitters used to be societal outcasts and no one wanted to be around one
and now it seems a bullshitter is finding a place of high esteem in our
society
Out
of Commission
My apologies for not being active on my blog
for a month now.
Not So Friggin Funny
Screwed Up Big Time
You might find this hard to believe but April
Fool's Day came and went without the slightest hint of a practical joke
Sound of
Music
We all want spring so badly. We exchange one
ass ache for another. Snow and cold for black flies and mosquitoes
I'm Reminded of Potholes
With the rattling of my pea brain each time I
hit a hole in which I wonder if there is a bottom,
Spring is in the Air
The smell of spring is in the air in Maine -
the stench of the decomposed mud that begins to show up everywhere.
You Might be a Mainer if
I'm sure most of you have heard all the latest
"you might be a Mainer if" little anecdotes but let's throw out a few of
them if nothing more than just a refresher.
The
Way we Think
If there are two women sitting on a park bench
and both are eating an ice cream cone and one is sucking
The
Calling of the Moose
At first Walter used his hands and his mouth
to try to mimic the call of a cow moose in hopes of luring the giant bull from
the forest.
Can't Leave it Alone
I'm not sure if my obsession is with how hard
I laugh, my outright disgust, or the simple fact that I don't understand how
stupid people can be
Little Outhouse Humor
"Just stick your head in the damned whole and
you'll see what the problem is
Funny Animals
There was one big ole boy there that could
have passed for a turkey and when he crowed it was in bass, while across the
crowded floor, I could hear another much smaller rooster cackling in
soprano.
Forget the
Groundhog! What about the Whackos?
he makes a couple of calls on his cell phone
and awakens the whackos of the world to let them know that it
is time to venture into the world and annoy as many people as they can.
The Oscars are Over - Good!
I figured out why the Oscar presentations put
so much emphasis on finding the right Master of Ceremonies - because the show is
so friggin boring
More
Out of Whack People
I guess it is acceptable to dye our skin,
punch holes in our bodies in places there was never any intention to have holes,
color our hair,
Sensitivity Sessions
They would sit around in groups and first
discover who they were - ain't that a joke
I'm Messed in the Head
if we don't get our heads out of our God given
disaster shelters, that would be back where the sun don't shine
Fashion Police
the blast hit me so hard my somewhat receding
hairline was forced back another inch or so
Virginia is for Lovers
I sort of like guessing what colored panties
another woman might be wearing.
Super Bowl is Over
It's over and the Pats won - no big surprise but
what about the commercials.
Full of
It
one of the horses and deposited a big load of
"political output" on the ground
A Pill for Everything
Or maybe a pill for John Kerry so he can make up
his mind once and for all.
Daddy, Why am I This Way?
Let's fire all the fat people and then move on to
the ugly looking ones. After that we can target anyone with
Art of Yardsaling
he owner of said junk knows how much he needs to
get for a certain piece of invaluable trash - let's say 50 cents. So he prices
it at $2.00.
Why oh
Why
When you buy hot dog rolls, they come in packages of 8 or 12. Who was the brain surgeon who
figured that one out?
Think
About It
Sometimes the methods to their madness leaves even
the most astute scratching their logically pure minds.
Contrary Behavior
I would presume it to be "normal" to contradict
other people and some of the bizarre and not so bizarre things they do but to
contradict yourself is insane behavior - isn't it?
Prize
Bull
"them trying times" was having large families -
this of course was necessary because many hands were needed
Giving
and Getting
Directions
Mainers assume that the rest of the world (see
above description) should know
Open-Ended Questions
Mainers comes across as being very "littral"
(literal). But do they come across that way because they are smart
What's Up With That?
have a plow on their truck and they'll plow their
driveway, front lawn, back lawn, the acre and a half out back of the house and
all the way
Talking Cars
One day I met a talking car. It was in the winter
Holy Matrimony
Being young and stupid is probably good in that if
we were any smarter marriage
Happy New Year
If you're too stupid to know what you are, why
make a resolution
Son-of-a-bitch!
I would assume that you were screwed up in the
head
Are You in Sync?
while trying to re-synchronize your
synchronization that you run the risk of not being in sync
A Truck
Load
to see a 12 yard dump truck delivering a load of
coal..
Coal in Your Stocking
"Oh, look! There's Jesus in the boat...
Gag Me With a Spoon
How about another television commercial with a
nauseating rendition of "Santa Baby".
Virgil & Florena
Have Faces
That Florena woman scares me. She reminds me of my 3rd graded teacher I had for
3 years in a row.
A Bit of Yule Laughter
three fellas died and went to heaven just prior to Christmas
Reflecting on Our
Intelligence
I don't understand why we are so dumb
Spam - Not the
Kind in a Can
don't try to disguise it with "bad" spelling - like ?SeeXXX.
Teaching Bears about Contraception?
Free bear condoms? The morning after pill? What?????
Pets
it is bad to let your dog share his food dish with let's say, your husband
Bad Weather From Florida
she asked Daddy if the fog was bad weather
Discover 2004
can you imagine being in a business where you bring people together and teach
them how to laugh
Where's November
and all the whiners who never go outside
Listening to Joe Perham
One of the biggest reasons I laugh I won't go
into because I don't want to piss anyone off
Getting the Blog Working
A
Time for Thanks
Journal Becomes a Blog
Political
Blues
As we all suffered this past election year, Tom took out
his frustrations by writing a song...
Maine
Huntin' Season
We all know what happens when you turn the crazies loose
in the woods of Maine.......
Maine, The Way Life Should Be?
Note the question mark! What's becoming of Maine? Not
really sure it is shaping up to be the way life should be......
Skiers
It's that time of year again when we turn our highways
over to those hell-bent on getting to the slopes so they can sit in the
lounge and drink all day. That way they are more apt to enjoy their ride
home. |